What To Do
WHAT TO DO WHEN SOMEONE GOES MISSING
Going missing is not a crime.
Every year approximately 6,000 people are reported missing in Ireland – that’s an average of 16 per day. While over 95% are located within a short period of time, the impact on families, friends and the missing persons themselves can be devastating.
It is important to remember that people go missing for a variety of reasons. In some cases, the person may be escaping from real or perceived family or personal conflict, they may be victims of foul play, whilst others may be asserting their independence or taking time out. Some simply forget to make contact.
When someone you care about is missing it is often hard to know what you should do or where to turn for support. The first step is to file a report with the Gardai if you have concerns for the safety or welfare of your missing family member or friend.
You do not have to wait 24 hours before reporting a person missing.
How can you help the Gardai
There is certain information that Gardai will ask you to provide, including:
- The persons full name and any aliases they use.
- Place and date of birth.
- A complete description of the person including any distinguishing features, such as tattoos, birth marks or scars.
- A recent, clear and preferably colour photograph.
- Details of where and when the person was last seen or heard from.
- What the person was wearing including any jewellery.
- A contact list of the persons friends, relatives and colleagues.
- A list of places the person frequents such as clubs, shopping centres, hotels, parks, amusement arcades or restaurants.
- Bank account and credit card details.
- Details of any vehicle owned or used by the person.
- Details of any medications the person may require and what it is used to treat.
Are there any other agencies who can help?
Depending on the circumstances you may choose to request the services of tracing organisations such as the Salvation Army or International Missing Persons Organisations. These agencies may not require the same information as Gardai. They could ask for other details, especially if the person was last seen or heard from while overseas or living in a conflict zone or natural disaster area.
Other agencies may be in a position to provide assistance by publishing photos of the Missing Person on their website, these include the Irish Missing Persons Association and the UK Missing People Helpline – contact details for these organisations are shown in our Links section.
Keep a comprehensive contact list of people involved in the search, including tracing organisation personnel and the name, rank, station and contact details of Gardai/Police.
Special Note
While this is obviously a distressing time it may help you to know that most people reported missing in Ireland are found, often within just a few days.
Please don't hesitate to contact Gardai or the Missing Persons Helpline if you have any questions or wish to supply additional information.
General
Search Options
When someone you care about is missing it is often hard to know what you should do. The first step is to file a report with the Police if you have concerns for the safety and welfare of your missing family member or friend.
The following links should help you when dealing with a missing loved one or friend and in assisting with your search:
Helping with the search
Many families and friends of missing people say they gain a sense of control, direction and purpose by “keeping busy”. The following suggestions are useful if you wish to be more actively involved in the search process.
It is strongly recommended to check with Gardai or your tracing organisation before you undertake any of the suggested activities and inform them of your progress.
Photographs
- Have multiple photos of the person printed for distribution to the media, inclusion on posters and for other publicity purposes Photos should be recent, clear and in colour.
Posters
- Have posters made featuring the missing person. It is strongly advisable to only display Police or the Helpline contact number, not your own private or mobile phone numbers.
- Approach local community groups to help distribute posters.
- Keep a list of where posters are distributed and where they are displayed to avoid duplication.
- Consider displaying posters in areas such as shopping centres, bus stops and railway stations, at local sporting and entertainment venues, libraries, local councils, clubs and community centres.
Spread the word
- Leave a description of the missing person with local taxi and bus services. Ask them to contact your case officer if they received any information.
- Talk to Police or your Helpline about making a public appeal via the media.
- Check with local taxi, train, ferry and bus services. If your missing person suffers a mental illness they may have wandered from home and travelled on public transport.
Keep records
- If dealing with Police write down the name, rank, station, phone and fax numbers of the Officer taking your missing person’s report.
- Keep details of all the organisations you contact for help including support services or professional practitioners.
- Record specific details of any inquiries you conduct and people you speak to .
Working with the media
Police or the Missing Persons Helpline will often ask media outlets to print or broadcast details about a missing person in an effort to obtain valuable information from the public.
Dealing with the media for the first time can be confronting. Handing over cherished photos or other personal items for publicity purposes can also be an emotionally difficult decision.
Remember: always consult your Police case officer before approaching the media.
The following guidelines provide suggestions to help you work in cooperation with journalists, photographers and camera crews..
Deciding to make a public appeal
If you would like to involve the media, the first step is to talk to police or your search organisation.
You should not expect your case officer to immediately turn to the media for help unless the missing person has an urgent medical need or there are grave concerns for their safety.
What the media will require
The media will need basic information about the missing person such as their name, age, a physical description and their last known whereabouts.
This information can be supplied via a press release, usually prepared by the Police Press Office or a search organisation and distributed to television, radio and newspapers.
If you have already provided a photograph, and release permission, this may also be offered for publication or broadcast.
Photos should be recent, as clear as possible and preferably in colour. Some media outlets may consider broadcasting home video footage of the missing person.
Who should talk to the media
You may find you are too overwhelmed with emotion to answer questions form journalists about your missing relative or friend.
It may be helpful to appoint a relative or close friend to act as a family spokesperson.
Alternatively, you can ask your Garda case officer to provide someone to brief the media.
It is often helpful if you have a Garda or search organisation representative with you if you are being interviewed by the media. They may be able to provide additional information or step in if you are unable to continue.
What you should tell the media
If you decide to go ahead with an interview, prepare thoroughly. Talk to your case officer about the type of information you should and should not discuss about the missing person.
In some situations, Police or the Helpline may wish to keep particular details out of the public arena. Revealing certain information could inadvertently hinder an investigation.
You may wish to read a prepared statement and not answer questions rather than be interviewed.
Will the media run your story?
Once you have provided the media with a statement or an interview, there is no guarantee they will run a story. Your story is one of many news items that come across an editor’s or news director’s desk every day. Sometimes, another story may be considered more significant.
It is advisable not to argue with journalists if they don’t run your story. You may need their assistance at another time.
Dealing with the media at your home
There may be occasions when the media approaches you at home to ask for an interview or for photographs. You do not have to invite the media inside your home if you are uncomfortable or prefer to maintain your privacy.
If you have already provided Police or the Helpline with photographs, video tapes or any other items it is best to direct media representatives to them. Take care not to give original photos or any other valuable or precious items to the media. There is no guarantee they will be returned.
It is always a good idea to contact your case officer for advice before you participate in an interview at home.
Dealing with intrusive media
If members of the media are being overly intrusive or disruptive, request that they respect your privacy. If this fails, you should not hesitate to discuss any problems with your case officer. They may be able to liaise with journalists, editors or chief-of-staff about your privacy wishes.
Practical Matters
While inquiries are being carried out, there are several jobs that you may need to take care of on behalf of your missing relative or friend.
Some of these suggestions might not apply to your situation at this particular time but could be useful at a later stage.
Inform the necessary people:
- Notify the missing person’s employer, school, club or business associates
- Try and cancel any social engagements, business appointments or travel plans the missing person may have scheduled in the near future.
Personal property:
- If the missing person lives alone, arrange for someone to collect their mail and attend to the upkeep of their property.
- Have someone take care of the missing person’s pets if they have any.
- If someone will be driving the missing person’s car, make sure they have adequate insurance and the authority to make a claim.
Finances:
- Arrange for payment of the missing person’s mortgage, rent, bills or other financial obligations.
- Ask your case officer if the missing person’s bank account(s) should be closed. In some cases, Gardai may elect to keep them open for monitoring.
Legal issues:
If your relative or friend is missing for an extended period, you may need to seek legal advice about matters such as life insurance, superannuation, will, trust funds and what can be done with personal property such as their house or car.
Your health and welfare
Families and friends of missing people often report common feelings of fear, anger, guilt, blame, frustration, sorrow, grief and isolation. While you may not experience all these reactions, it may help to know that they are normal responses to the events you are experiencing. The following information offers some suggestions which others have found helpful to cope emotionally and physically.
Your emotions:
- Crying, sleeplessness, bad dreams, moodiness, confusion, lack of appetite, loss of concentration, low tolerance and angry outbursts are all normal reactions when someone is missing.
Communicating with others:
- Talk to people about your situation and express your needs clearly and honestly with family, friends and colleagues.
- Give yourself permission to feel hurt, upset, angry, frustrated or sad. Express such feelings to a trusted friend, relative, counsellor or confidante.
- Contact crisis counselling services or seek professional assistance should you require support .
Taking care of each other:
- Consider asking a favourite aunt, uncle or close friend to keep an eye on younger family members if a close relative is missing. Children and teenagers will need to talk their feelings through, but could be afraid of upsetting their parents – especially if a sibling is missing.
- Children often show feelings through their behaviour in times of stress. Allow young people to talk openly and try to avoid judging their behaviour.
- Try not to get angry or upset with friends or family members who you feel may not share or understand your emotions. Responses to stress, grief and loss may vary significantly from person to person.
- Arrange for a group of friends, neighbours, relatives or colleagues to help you keep up with day-to-day activities. Divide jobs between you and share responsibilities.
Keeping well:
- Try and keep your diet healthy and well balanced. If you don’t feel up to cooking, or simply run out of time, have a relative or friend prepare meals.
- Do things that make you feel good. Take a walk, see a movie, work in your garden, have a massage, take a long bath or listen to your favourite music. Anything that gives you a sense of comfort.
- Try not to feel self conscious, or guilty, for taking time out. Looking after yourself is an important factor in coping while someone is missing.
One day at a time:
- Try not to make any big life changes. Your judgement at the moment may be affected.
- Try to include some of your normal routine in your daily schedule. If you usually meet with friends or play sport once a week, try to keep these plans.
Professional help:
- Do not hesitate to contact a support group, a trained counsellor, doctor, natural therapy practitioner or other qualified professional if you need support on an ongoing basis.
- If you are unsure where to seek support, please don’t hesitate to ask your case officer or the Missing Persons Helpline for a referral.
- If your missing persons returns home, consider obtaining professional counselling, mediation or reconciliation support to help prevent the situation recurring.
Essential health checklist
There is probably a lot going on around you and it may be difficult to maintain your usual routine or think clearly. People who have shared similar experiences have helped compile the following checklist to highlight some of the more personal practical matters you may need to handle.
Your work:
- Advise your employer of the situation and discuss the possibility of time off work if required.
Your finances:
- Speak to your bank manager or financial adviser if you think you will require extra funds to help cover mortgage payments, rent, bill or any unexpected travel or personal expenses.
- Arrange for a close friend, colleague or relative to keep track of your bills or other commitments you might not be able to attend to.
Your home life:
- Arrange for someone to stay at your home in case the missing person tries to make contact. If this is not practical, or the person is missing for a long period of time, an answering machine or mobile telephone are alternatives.
- Inform your neighbours that there may be Gardai and/or media present at your house.
- Arrange for a group of relatives or friends to take care of chores like cleaning, washing, ironing or preparing meals if you are unable to attend to these jobs.
- Have someone you trust take your children to and from school if search commitments or appointments do not allow you to do so.
Your privacy:
- It is not a good idea to publicise your private telephone or mobile phone numbers. This could lead to troublemakers or unscrupulous people trying to take advantage of your situation.
Families of missing people are often contacted by psychics and clairvoyants. While some may be genuinely trying to help, don’t feel obliged to deal with them. You can take their details if you wish or, preferably, ask them to contact your case officer.